theairlock | Week 3

Entry tags:

!round 4

Week 3

Week 3

[Two weeks in, and all at once four people are dead. Chitose, Miki, Lucina, and Tsurugi - whatever the circumstances, however any of you may feel, their rooms are just as empty at the end of the week. If you check your P.I.P.s, you'll find that their pictures on the profile page have gone monochrome.

C.E.C.E.'s morning announcement comes like clockwork on Sunday. This time, though, there's an addendum to her usual message:]

Congratulations, Champions! By surviving your first trial, you have unlocked the second floor of the ship. A new mini map has been added to your P.I.P.! To access the second floor please stand on the teleporter and select the floor you wish to be teleported to.

[In addition to the new floor, the Champions will find that they've gained another memory this week.]

Sunday | Monday | Tuesday | Wednesday | Thursday

(( Welcome to Week 3! Don't forget to check in and submit your memory regains! Turn in your benefactor threads for sweet loot, too! ))

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

That's what you're thinking about right now? [and he knows Max isn't joking, but it's still kind of funny and he lets himself smile for half a second] No, I know what you mean.

Someone's going to try to take this incentive. I can sense it, I know what the cafeteria felt like. Someone who trusted me before was going to trust the wrong person if I didn't say anything.

[Max arches an eyebrow.]

You brought up poisoning, dude. But seriously, you really think that's gonna help?

I don't know. [He thought he had though this through. He thinks of more right here.]

It could make it easier for someone to get away with it. If they make it look like it's me, what I said makes it that much more convincing instead. I just- I couldn't hold it in or I'd really have done it.

I couldn't face that.

Oh, hey, c'mon. [His tone is reassuring, and it catches even him off-guard. So quick to fall back into comforting him, when this is only their second conversation after Thomas confessed to aiding and abetting a serial killer?

...but. He deserves pity, if nothing else. Right? And it was brave, to just come out with something like that. Max tries to pick up the flow of what he was saying again.]

It would've been stupid for you to say something like that and then turn around and do it anyway. We'd all see right through that.

It's true, but... I shouldn't be putting you in that position. Making it harder. [it's not his own death he's worried about, not entirely. it's likely he doesn't have much longer alive once he gets back out; at best, law enforcement doesn't last long in prison and at worst he'll decide he doesn't need any living witnesses.]

What would you have done? [he says after a long pause] If you were the kind of person the incentive was meant for?

...huh. [Max lets out a huff of breath.] Shit, I dunno. Probably nothing. I dunno if I could handle the fallout from something like that.

It'd be your new deepest regret.

Wasn't saying I'd follow it up with a murder. I mean, I dunno if I'm already a murder or something in this scenario.

[why are you coming at him over something that didn't happen]

[and he's quiet, considering: he knows Max is uncomfortable]

I- I know you don't know where this is going, but please, follow me anyway. What makes you that guy? The one who decides to do nothing instead of risk it?

...I don't know. You don't see me running around telling everyone about my stuff now.

You don't. [does it mean that there isn't much "stuff" there, or just that Max knows how to handle his? he can't picture repression, not with this guy, but he is envious of whatever's there that lets him live, lets him take care of others, whether it's a clear conscience or a personal strength.]

Were you ever like that, or- could you always live with who you were?

...I mean, it's different here. I'm not gonna dump my shit on a bunch of traumatized teenagers.

[So, you know. Whatever that is.]

I guess I'm generally...okay with myself? [There's things he could name, but...not here and now, god. Ask him again in Deadland.]

You're lucky. I don't think a lot of people are.

[he'd heard an accusation already, knew how true it was, hated it but he can't go back on what he's already done so let it sit for a moment. he's been digging himself further and further into uselessness the past two days.]

I wasn't thinking of it like that. Telling them. If even one person didn't know, I thought-

I mean, I think it was kinda a brave thing to do, actually? They could've held something like that over your head really easy - the Overseers. Now...

[Well, he's got a host of other problems, things that could still get him killed. But at least those come from everyone else, and not the Authorities here.]

Now it's Kaiba instead. And kids trying to look out for me.

They shouldn't have to do this. You shouldn't have to do this, you're an artist, not...

Oh, don't worry about Kaiba. He's not gonna do anything. And me, I mean...yeah, none of us should be here. But I guess all we can do is...do what we can with what we have.

I'm not really worried. [he's lying, it's obvious in the tiny sliver of vibrato that slips through, but he'd never admit it] Maybe I am. But it isn't about me.

...yeah. I get that.

[.....let's not talk about that.]

So. If we got out of here and all went home, what would you do now?

[that really is the million dollar question, and he hasn't let himself even finish asking it when it begins to creep up in his thoughts. what he has to do in greenvale is so far removed from what he's willing to do in this place that he can't answer. he can't undo two lives with seventeen more, not for his own sake, but even as much as he regrets what he's already done, he knows that it's nowhere near over and he isn't done with him yet.]

...I don't know.

[...Max isn't sure what else he expected there, to be honest. Confessing to a bunch of strangers is one thing, but you don't just decide one day to turn your back on a serial killer you've been abetting. Especially if he's - probably? - your abusive boyfriend.

Shit.]

Guess you've got a while to think about it, at least?

[there's a long breath, and he hunkers into himself as he lets it go, but that doesn't last long. he looks a little more open as he pulls back out of inside his head. he can't change his answer, but if he gets that room- he can really understand what he's agreed to.]

All this- it's letting me clear enough space for that.

[and he looks like he's steeling himself for a moment, but he's got to invite this.]

I can- I know you don't want the ugly details, but if there's anything else... this is a good time for it.

Uh...geez, man.

[There's things, yeah, but they're things he's not sure would be more helpful than hurtful, or things he's not certain he has the standing to really say.]

You...he's not going to take you with him, is he? Being immortal.

[he shakes his head and starts to say something, but bites it back. thomas knows exactly who he's taking with him, but max? max doesn't need to know about emily. all anyone needs to know about that is on his profile, listing her next to dogs.]

It wasn't ever about me.

Obviously.

[I mean, he doesn't seem down with the murder. And...well, of course it wouldn't be. Nothing probably is.]

It's a stupid goal anyway. People aren't meant to live forever.

[it doesn't have to be about him: he doesn't want that whole fantasy of omnipotence to have been about him, he just wants to continue giving until he's reached his limit and then push beyond it. whatever happens to him when he returns happens, even if a part of him doesn't want it to. he shakes his head, knowing just how crazy it is.]

If everyone already looks to you like you're the law, you have all of the answers, you already start to act like you're a god, right? Before Anna died- the girl I told you about- I thought it was fantasy.

[he'd hoped it was. there was always something too dark in those fantasies for Thomas to dare ask about, and knowing he wouldn't get any answers kept him quiet.]

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