airlockedmods (
airlockedmods) wrote in
theairlock2017-11-19 09:04 pm
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week 6
[Six weeks. Twenty-three Champions whittled down to just seven. Where the halls of the station once felt crowded and loud now they're empty and echo when someone speaks too loudly. Again, the Champions will find themselves experiencing strange dreams on Sunday night but outside of the usual wake-up call there is no new floor announcement from CECE.
Like the trash compactor last week, the infirmary is pristine and sterile once again. As if nothing had ever happened.]
(( Welcome to Week 6! Don't forget to submit your memory regains and turn in your benefactor threads for sweet loot, too! There's going to be no AC this week.))
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This is stupid, and I'm a moron. Not this, this is still a good idea, I mean the...finding it difficult. It's not physically difficult. It's just hair.
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[the burns and sight loss were one thing. But having to adapt the day to day around the new unwanted reality... It was somehow even more damaging]
... I don't wanna look in the mirror and not recognize me, either.
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...But then. I chose to create it. I chose a look, I chose a style, I chose change when it suited me.
I should still be capable of doing something so simple. It's cosmetic, not permanent.
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[it's almost like he pulled the word out of nowhere... But the burns made it appropriate. He's read of shaving and burning being used as marks of shame in the past.]
Petuu isn't doing it, you are. Or I guess I am.
[he reaches out, brushing the hair here and there to get an idea for length]
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No.
[no logical debate on why he's wrong. No assurances that the others wouldn't think of it that way. It's almost childish in its denial, and that isn't HIS title. But he says it in a way that conveys utter conviction in its validness. Like a universal truth]
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The understanding and the touch still him and silence him. For a second, he forgets to breathe, like everything inside of him is wound up so tight as to restrict his lungs. And at last, he glances away. Doesn't shake Akira off, by any means. Just...away.]
It's hard to see it as reclamation from this angle.
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[Is that a joke? He's smiling, either way. He let's go of one side of Kaiba's head to get the scissors.]
I have no idea what what I'm doing, just so you know.
[Which could apply to... most things, honestly]
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As with everything else in this hellhole, I think we're all just making it up as we go along.
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[He takes the bangs between his finger, good eye narrowed as he took a good guess at where to start, and... 'snipsnip']
Isn't being adaptable what makes us human?
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I know we can adapt, are adapting. I know we can overcome. It's just a lot at once. Between Yuri and Petuu, and Max and that farce of a trial. This, this isn't about vanity; it's control, and recovery, and maybe it's too soon for control and recovery. I just want the smallest semblance of normality. And it feels so out of reach, even though nothing is ever beyond my grasp.
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Well, D&D is today, right? Though I dunno if... it'll be hard, without Father Fisticuffs. We should all meet up, either way.
[He tilts his head]
You'll manage something.
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[He breathes out a slow sigh.] I'm not used to this, showing weakness in front of anyone.
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[Not just him, but everyone here]
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Well, then I'll cover that weakspot while you get things done.
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[It was how he lived]
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[It was one thing to go charging into danger. To fight and struggle and drag out every bit of his life. But it was pointless alone.
But he also realizes that... well, he hasn't been fair in sharing his own burdens]
... I think I might be dead. Back home.
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Heh, you've seen how I get. You're that surprised?
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[His tone is casual, hands still steady. Like this knowledge has been put down so deep he hasn't really emotionally accepted it]
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