won't you take me to flavortown

[theoversaw]

[At the end of that one hour (that seemed so much longer than just one hour could be), hopefully everyone's gathered in the cafeteria. The doors to the other side of the space station open to reveal two figures, a man and a woman. The woman is dressed in sharp business clothes, tapping away on some kind of a device that looks similar to but sleeker than a smart phone. The man with her has a circle beard and bleached blond hair, shorter but thick with muscle, wearing a checked button-up shirt with a gold chain peeking through the collar and the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. He scratches at his non-dominant forearm (which, nonetheless, is bare).]

Welcome, Champions, to the...

Champion Excellence Program.

Yeah, the Champion Excellence Program. As you may have noticed reading the rules, there's only one way out of here: Rule 7. But just in case going home isn't enough for you, we've decided to add an extra incentive.

[The woman barely looks up from her phone, like she's doing a headcount of the Champions.] The Champion who successfully proves their Excellence by murdering a fellow Champion and escaping punishment will receive an all-expenses-paid space cruise to the Vegas Quadrant.

[The man gives his companion a deadpan look and then looks at the Champions.]

Any questions?

Comments

[challengesfate]

[There's...a lot of questions Lucina has already, and this...this answers none of them. It in fact raises a significant number of them to the surface. For that initial moment, Lucina's expression is beyond blank - it's unreadable by any means, stunned and confused and scrambling for purchase on something she can form into words. And after that moment, it grabs onto something...not quite frustration, but not as small as irritation. It sort of straddles the two as she steps forward, bringing a hand to her head.]

This...no. [She shakes her head.] No, this is...so foolish. This can't be right, this is - why can we not simply go home? W-why are you doing this - why that rule, why all of us?! Why are we in a metal building in the sky?!?

[Uh, she's. Getting kind of loud. And. Maybe someone should pull her back and get her to calm down? It's kind of been a really weird hour in an awful way.]

[theundertaken]

Woah, hey, maybe we should calm down a little...

[Not that this isn't bullshit, but this is, uh.]

[challengesfate]

[Max, help, you were cool about magic and wanted to see Falchion, she can't process half of what's going on right now.]

I - I...[Okay, calm down, Lucina. He has a point. Take a deep breath, in...out...close your eyes and try to forget that everything around you is nigh unfathomable.] I just...cannot accept such a rule to be our only means of exit, on top of all of this - and then a pleasure trip for a murder, and...

[She's rambling, but the general idea of it is "what the flying fuck is going on".]

[theundertaken]

[He reaches out to put a hand on her shoulder and walk her back a little, if she'll allow it.]

I mean, yeah, this is pretty fucked. But hey, it's not like anyone's really gonna do it. It's total bullshit!

[challengesfate]

[She allows it, since Max is like one of the least threatening people in the room and is also one of the few actual adults.]

You're...you are right, it's a shallow and fickle reason...I...I just...it's incredulous - insulting...

[theundertaken]

[Once they're farther away, he'll add in a lower tone:] I think it's probably not too safe to go after those guys? They must have something, or they wouldn't come hang out with a mob of us like this.

But yeah, nobody would kill someone for something like that. It's stupid. We've just gotta...I don't know, figure this out together, we're all in the same boat.

[challengesfate]

[She lowers her tone as well, but responds pretty quickly,] I wouldn't be foolish enough to attack an enemy unarmed.

[I mean, come on, what do you take her for?]

Right...right, I...yes. We should...discuss this, as a proper group, not...not with them, and not when there's so much...tension, and...

[We all gotta calm the eff down, is what she's saying.]

[theundertaken]

Holy shit do you have a knife?

[yeah that’s what he pulled from that]

[challengesfate]

Wh...no? I don't know how to fight with a knife, anyway...

[Max they took her sword she has nothing]

[theundertaken]

...oh, you weren't gonna attack them at all. Jesus.

[look that sounded more like "I wouldn't do it unarmed, duh, I got a weapon already"]

It can't be that hard, right? Just stab with it.

[challengesfate]

No, that would be very stupid...

[Also lack of sword.]

There's...techniques and proper knife usage, I...I've never trained with one, and I don't know anyone who has. [Dagger weapons class, what's that, sounds fake.] If I just charged in with a knife, I could end up hurting myself more than someone else...

[theundertaken]

Can't say I've ever been in a knife fight. If I had to pick, I'd probably just go with a blunt object, that sounds easiest.

[challengesfate]

[I mean. Blades are usually more effective, but this is not the kind of situation to bring that up in, now is it.]

I...suppose to each their own, then.

[theundertaken]

[Easiest for an idiot to stab himself with by accident too!]

Whatever. We shouldn't be attacking people anyway. Um... [He fishes for another topic.] ...so, seems like he's the talker and she's the one in charge, yeah?

[challengesfate]

U-Um...I suppose? I don't really...have much context for what he'd said, though, and she seems...

[Super duper sketch.]

[theundertaken]

I mean, he didn't even have the Vegas thing memorized. That might've been the first he knew of it. Which is weird, if they're equal partners.

[challengesfate]

Perhaps he too comes from a realm where it doesn't exist.

[theundertaken]

He didn't even know they were offering it, though. Or he just forgot. So, yeah, maybe he's actually just bad at this.

[challengesfate]

Do you think we will ever have the opportunity to speak with them? Beyond just...having them come in and tell us something that makes little to no sense.

[karappo]

Lucina-san-

[Is...it okay if he calls you that? He's never sure but it seems easiest. He comes to her side once he's done having a meltdown over his lost clothing, reaching for her arm- but then thinking better of it and pulling back.]

We will get our answers in due time. As awful as it is to be expected to murder as a means of an escape, I do not see anyone taking it that seriously.

[He says as his own brother literally just took it seriously. Kindof.]

[challengesfate]

[I mean, whatever a "san" is, it sounds perfectly fine, she's not going to argue it. Especially not in a state of slowly-reducing distress.

She takes a moment to breathe, looking over at Karamatsu to listen to what he's saying...and then nods once, shakily.]

No - you're right, I just - this is...

[Everything happens so much..............]

[karappo]

I know.

[He isn't sure how much of a help just...saying something like this can be, but he isn't sure what else to do. And seeing her so incensed makes him feel like he should do something.]

It is not right, none of this is.

[challengesfate]

[It's still a good thing to know she's not alone in her feelings - even though it seems like most everyone is on about the same wavelength, joking questions aside.

She takes another slow, steadying breath.]

I...I need a moment. I'm sorry...

[karappo]

Do not apologize. Just take your time.

[He's just going to stand nearby to make sure she'll be okay...]

[challengesfate]

[Good that's...good. Because so long as she's standing and breathing and not yelling anymore, she'll eventually calm down.]