Welcome to the Program

[airlockedmods]

Good Morning, Champions. In the interest of maintaining healthy sleep patterns, a day/night cycle is in effect. Your presence is expected in the cafeteria in exactly one hour.

[The voice comes through not a large speaker, but through the device that's attached to each Champion's arm. Further investigation of the features of the device will reveal a list of profiles, a mini-map, and a list of rules. The hallways are shiny white and silver, with running lights along the floor and lights on the ceiling, and at the junction of the hallways is a sign with a knife and fork icon and an arrow pointing down the hall.

Welcome to the Excellence Program, Champions. Time to get to know your teammates.]

Comments

[hellahighwater]

Mom, money, step-douche.

[ Leeeaning back in her chair. ]

A nice little roadblock to end all roadblocks.

[karappo]

[Karamatsu's brows furrow a little.]

I am sorry to hear that. Money is another issue entirely, but...no one deserves to have bad family to deal with.

[It just reminds him how lucky he is to have a mom and dad who haven't kicked him and his siblings out yet.]

[hellahighwater]

Mom's just controlling. [ She instantly feels like she has to defend her, despite just mildly trash-talking. ] She's not bad, except her damn taste in men.

[karappo]

I understand. My family is fortunate in that regard...Mommy and Daddy did nearly split up once, but they ultimately decided that trying to choose with of us to take with them was too difficult a task.

[hellahighwater]

[ ... ]

Dude, did you just say that? How fucking old are you?

[karappo]

Eh? I...I am in my twenties...

[What's wrong with what he said...]

[hellahighwater]

And you call your parents Mommy and Daddy?

[karappo]

Of course I do, why would I not? They deserve respect.

[hellahighwater]

That's not respect, that's what a little kid says, bro.

[karappo]

W-well...it is what I have always called them, anyway. I have not seen any reason to change that now.

[Well, he sure did earn his title, at the very least.]

[hellahighwater]

Ugghh, you're such an easy target, this is actually kind of sad.

[karappo]

W...what do you mean, "easy target"?

[hellahighwater]

To make fun of. You just scream it.

[karappo]

Ah.

My brothers do that a lot.

[Gee, wonder why.]

[hellahighwater]

Guess they see it too.

[karappo]

I...would not say that, exactly. Is that not what brothers do anyway, regardless? You know...sibling rivalry, and all?

[hellahighwater]

Wouldn't know. Only child.

[karappo]

[Ah...]

I see...I could not imagine what it would be like, living alone. Not having to share with anyone...

[...It would have probably been pretty nice, actually. One sibling is one thing, but having to split everything you get six different ways sucks.]

[hellahighwater]

Having my own space is pretty nice. [ It's true, there. ] You've got a brother here too, right? How many others?

[karappo]

[Karamatsu's getting to experience having his own room right now...so far he's actually not sure if he likes it as much as he thought he would.]

That is right. I have four other brothers. There are six of us total.

[hellahighwater]

Six?!

[karappo]

Six. We are sextuplets.

[So you know. There's four more of Karamatsu out there in the cosmos, somewhere.]

[hellahighwater]

...Six...

[ IT'S SINKING IN AND IT'S HORRIFYING ]

[karappo]

That is correct! Though...I do not know where the younger four are. Presumably they are back home.

[Or driving the ship, if Osomatsu's theory is to be believed.]

[hellahighwater]

You all look the same?!

[ THIS IS WILD ]