Welcome to the Program

[airlockedmods]

Good Morning, Champions. In the interest of maintaining healthy sleep patterns, a day/night cycle is in effect. Your presence is expected in the cafeteria in exactly one hour.

[The voice comes through not a large speaker, but through the device that's attached to each Champion's arm. Further investigation of the features of the device will reveal a list of profiles, a mini-map, and a list of rules. The hallways are shiny white and silver, with running lights along the floor and lights on the ceiling, and at the junction of the hallways is a sign with a knife and fork icon and an arrow pointing down the hall.

Welcome to the Excellence Program, Champions. Time to get to know your teammates.]

Comments

[dejabrew]

[He makes a disdainful noise.]

Dunkin' Donuts is one thing, it's a donut shop that sells coffee because of the innate compatibility of coffee and donuts and happens to have gotten...passable at coffee through practice. Also, "Time to make the donuts" is a stupid slogan.

But Starbucks. [He says it with the same tone that you might say the name of the neighbor who pisses through the knothole in the fence and kills your flowers.]

[theundertaken]

[Max listens to all of this with a neutral expression, while contemplating how to proceed with this Mega Coffee Nerd]

Tourist towns are just like that. People don't come to Disney looking for, like...artisanal coffee or whatever. [Is artisanal coffee a thing?]

[dejabrew]

Obviously not. If you can’t go to the countries themselves then everyone knows the SCAA is in Washington, DC.

...That’s the, uh. Specialty Coffee Association of America.

[theundertaken]

I'm pretty sure most people don't know that.

[Max turns the PIP on and flips through it as he talks. Damn, not the Champion Coffee Geek.]

So, uh, how's the space coffee?

[dejabrew]

Probably Colombian, or a blend trying to pass itself off as Colombian. Still better than the burnt dishwater they serve at Swillbucks.

Want some?

[theundertaken]

Suuuuuuuuure. [god, fuck, he's gonna have to bring up Starbucks again, this is great] I mean, I usually just make instant coffee at home.