[She barely hears what Nari's saying about peeing on sticks because she's so hopeful. And then Nari is hugging her and she doesn't know what to do aside from turn into her and try not to cry.]

It's so stupid. Wanting something like-

Look at where we are. How can I-

[The fight with her tears is one she's losing quickly.]

I was never supposed to be here without him. [In case anyone was wondering what she was planning to do if she won.]