[He's being called out, and he doesn't like it. This is a deer in the headlights. Looks to the door, to make sure no one's coming. Looks at the floor, looks anywhere but at Ardyn. This past almost two months has sure been testing him on sharing his feelings in a way that manly yet deeply insecure dudes in the army are definitely not supposed to do.
And what if it's better to not know, to never know, to keep playing this game, before he loses Ardyn for good?
He's not good with words. Even when it counts. Maybe especially when it counts.]
When, uh. Wh-when we're... Di--fuck. Okay. Fuck. This is stupid, this is stupid, this is so stupid.
Don't. laugh. I'm serious, don't even think about laughing.
...
[It's a big bubble in his chest, and he holds his breath as if he can keep it inflated for a few seconds more while he blankly tries to find the words. And then he lets it out, shoulders sinking but body still tense.]
Every time we've kissed, it's been under the pretense of a challenge. 'cept for that time I--y'know. So is-that--is that just what it, uh, is it just a challenge, is what it is, a fun little...way to...is th--is that what it is, when you kiss me, a challenge met?
no subject
And what if it's better to not know, to never know, to keep playing this game, before he loses Ardyn for good?
He's not good with words. Even when it counts. Maybe especially when it counts.]
When, uh. Wh-when we're... Di--fuck. Okay. Fuck. This is stupid, this is stupid, this is so stupid.
Don't. laugh. I'm serious, don't even think about laughing.
...
[It's a big bubble in his chest, and he holds his breath as if he can keep it inflated for a few seconds more while he blankly tries to find the words. And then he lets it out, shoulders sinking but body still tense.]
Every time we've kissed, it's been under the pretense of a challenge. 'cept for that time I--y'know. So is-that--is that just what it, uh, is it just a challenge, is what it is, a fun little...way to...is th--is that what it is, when you kiss me, a challenge met?