[It's just a little (or a big) heft and a lean back just to get you off your feet, Ardy! And right back down again. With a little wheeze.]

Jesus, how much more weight do the clothes add on? I'm just taking a metaphor and making it entertainingly literal in an attempt to distract from the emotional matter at hand, what's it look like I'm doing?

[Let it never be said that Church is not painfully self-aware. At times.]